When you are a kid Halloween is the best. You get to stay up late, get free candy, then eat all the candy while watching a movie you should probably not be watching. It’s the best. As a parent it is significantly more stressful. First, you have to get your kids to give a straight answer on what they want to be. Our daughter has told us she wanted to be a unicorn, Cat boy, Owlette, Elsa and some other random things I can’t recall. The unicorn was first, so we ordered it from amazon. Of course, as soon as it arrived she wanted to be other things. Then my wife and I had to become salesmen and convince her why being a unicorn was so much better. Your child wanting to switch their costume is only matched by the stress of finding a cute couples costume. Have you ever tried to figure out a couple’s costume? It is very hard to find something that you both like, isn’t stupid, and also isn’t made for college kids and is insanely inappropriate for people in their mid-thirties.
Costumes my wife and I have been over the last few years:
Peter and Lois Griffin
Mario and Princess Peach
Kenny Power and Little Miss Sunshine (This was not a couple costume obviously)
Bank Robbers
Eleven and Dustin from Stranger Things
Stone Cold Steve Austin and Macho Man Randy Savage
Avocado and Toast
(What couples costumes have you been recently?)
In college Halloween was amazing. Sleep in. Throw on an NBA jersey and claim to be an athlete, go to a club, bar, or party where everyone was dressed in clothing they would not wear in public at any other time. Have lots of drinks, sleep in and do it again one more time that weekend. (College weekends start on Thursday and that should happen in the real world too!)
Halloween is only really awkward when you are a teenager before college and when you are an adult with children. As a teen the “am I too old to get candy” comes up often. As an adult the stress of the day removes the fun.
If both parents work, as is the case in my house, Halloween is a day of rushing around for an hour of kid’s fun.
Halloween Schedule
730-4 Work
4-530 Pickup kids, feed them food, make them look nice and get them in costume.
530-6 Attempt to get kids to stand next to each other and stand still for one damn second so we can get one Instagram worthy picture to post and text to family that isn’t on social media.
6-7 Trick or Treating while the kids complain about walking so much and asked to be carried at least seven times, but not wanting to stop.
7-7:15 Kids have had enough and want to go home and eat all the candy.
7-8 Kids hand out candy and eat candy.
8-10: Give kids a bath and pray they actually sleep since they have eaten so much candy.
You know how the day of prom people going to prom got to go home early to get ready? All parents should get to leave work at lunch to prepare for Halloween. Wouldn’t that make everything much easier?
I really do enjoy taking my kids out on Halloween, but then how do parents also hand out candy? The bowl with a “take one” sign kind of works, but isn’t ideal. One parent should not have to stay home and hand out candy, both parents should be able to go out and enjoy the night with their kids.
I know it sounds like I am complaining a lot, but all of these issue are normal adulting things. I love nights like this with my family, even if the stress and rushing around drive me crazy. As I have mentioned before bed time can be difficult enough, let alone after a super fun night full of sugar. Despite all of that, nothing is keeping me from walking a unicorn and Super Mario riding Yoshi around tomorrow night.
Win The Weekends 